Legacy Youth Ministry Resources

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Why Emphasize Abstinance

Why emphasize abstinence: On the failure of state sex ed programs, which tended to bypass discussions of morality (taking a moral stand against premarital sex) and rather taught the mechanics of sex and dangers of unprotected sex: "Since the federal government began its major contraception program in 1970, unwed pregnancies have increased 87% among 15- to 19-year-olds. Likewise, abortions among teens rose 67%; unwed births went up 61 percent. And venereal disease has infected a generation of young people." ("In Defense of a Little Virginity," Focus on the Family, 1992) "Adams City High School in Commerce City Colorado was one of the nation's first schools to begin distributing condoms. Now, three years later, the birth rate there is 30% higher than the national average." (Current Thoughts and Trends, Aug, 92) When you talk to parents about the need to regularly discuss the morality of sex with their children, you might want to show the difficiencies in the "just make sure you wear a condom" approach. It could be presented in a skit: If we took the same tactic with drug education that we take with sex education, a class might go something like this: Teacher: "Class, it would be great if none of you would use drugs, but we know from statistics that most of you will try them. Being in a public school, it's not my place to try to tell you what's right and wrong, but I can tell you some ways to make drug use safer. First, when mainlining heroin, always use sterile needles. Using dirty needles can cause serious illness. Wipe the area with an alcohol swab. If you're embarrassed to purchase these at a drug store, our school clinic has made sterile needles and wipes available. Really, no one will find out, not even your parents. Now, here's how you find a vein..." ? Copyright 2002 Steve Miller - All Rights Reserved

Magic Johnson on Sex

When basketball superstar Magic Johnson was first interviewed (on Arsenio Hall) after finding that he was HIV positive, his message was to use condoms. But after he got better educated on the subject, he was interviewed by Connie Chung. His new message? Although condoms make sex safer, "the safest sex of all is no sex." (My Life, by Earvin "Magic" Johnson, Random House, 1992, p. 274) ? Copyright 2002 Steve Miller - All Rights Reserved

Inadequacy of Condoms

"...in a study conducted for UCLA the AIDS virus was found to leak through 4 major brands of condoms." (YouthWorker Update, Nov. '89) While condoms may make sex safer, they don't make it safe.

As Long As You're Making Love, Not Just Sex

Sometimes using a quote by a student that reflects common attitudes is helpful to use for discussion. Wende expresses a common thought of many, if not most students: Wende, a 17-year-old senior, said, "I tell my friends they're stupid to have sex with gigolos, guys who have sex with everybody. For me, as long as it's in a caring relationship, as long as you're making love and not just having sex, it's OK." (Atlanta Journal, 1/13/91, p. D1)

Be Careful Who You Date!

"The National Center for the Prevention and Control of Rape conducted a study of 6,100 undergraduate college students. The study concluded one in four women were victims of rape or attempted rape by the age of 18; 84% of those raped knew their attackers; 57% of the rapes happened on dates." A 1990 study of 1,700 sixth to ninth graders found that "25% said that it was acceptable to rape a girl if a guy spends money on her. Sixty five percent stated it is acceptable for a man to rape a girl if they've been dating for more than six months!" (Josh McDowell Ministry newsletter, March, 1990)

Student Acquires STD

Thousands of students packed out an auditorium to hear one of America's hottest Christian bands. After an energetic performance, a respected Christian speaker stood up to challenge students to keep themselves sexually pure. But before he could finish, a local university student jumped onto the stage, wanting to address the audience. The surprised speaker cautiously allowed the student to share this tragic story. While in college, he had gotten involved with a wild fraternity. At a party, his fraternity brothers set him up with a wild girl and they had sex. I believe it was his first time. But soon he began to experience some physical problems. He went to see a doctor and found, to his horror, that he had acquired Herpes Simplex II, a venereal disease that has no cure. He would not die of the disease, but he began to sob as he said that one day he would meet that person who was right for him, and he would have to tell her of this disease, which could infect her as well if they married. It was just a casual encounter, but the consequences will last a lifetime.

One In Four With STD

Even prior to AIDS, some authorities were calling STD?s the worst disease epidemic in our society. And get this: The Center for Disease Control estimates that one out of every 4 adults in America now has an STD! (STD Brochure, American Social Health Association)

TV Doesn't Tell The Whole Story About Sex

Each year the average person views 9,230 scenes depicting sex or implied sex. And 81% of the sex is outside of marriage (Why Wait?, p. 41). Put that together with the fact that one in four sexually active youth will acquire an STD before they graduate from high school, and I come away with a major question. Of the 92,230 sex scenes you have viewed over the past 10 years, how many of you have ever seen a show where a character picks up a disease from their casual sex experience? (Get a show of hands from the youth.) Not even one? Does this strike you as odd? If 92,000 t.v. characters played in war scenes over the past 10 years and we never saw an injury, Roger Ebert and the rest of us would be crying out for some reality. Television has told us that we can have casual sex without physical consequences.It would be a great reality shock to viewers if James Bond were to pay some price for his casual sex. Let him develop a troublesome itch, visit a doctor, be diagnosed with herpes, and be warned to stop all sexual activity. But will it ever happen? Not a chance. ? Copyright 2002 Steve Miller - All Rights Reserved

Teen Fantasy and Virus Convention

Young people tend to believe that car wrecks and pregnancies and S.T.D's. happen to other people, not them. Psychologists have a name for it, "The teen fantasy." "Other youth may get pregnant, but not me." "Other youth may get S.T.D's., but not me. Hoods and greasy people may get them, but not me." It's as if each month viruses hold a convention and compare pictures of potential hosts to see who they will infect next: Virus #1: NO, NOT HER, SHE'S THE CAPTAIN OF THE CHEERLEADERS, HAS GOOD PARENTS, AND WASHES HER HAIR REGULARLY. Virus #2: YEA, I DESPISE THE POPULAR ONES. SHOW ME A PICTURE OF A REAL LOSER! ? Copyright 2002 Steve Miller - All Rights Reserved

Wish You Had Gone Further?

Bob Stone, with twenty five years of counseling experience, has yet to meet one person who wished he or she had gone further sexually while dating.

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